I Hate Everything But You

The smell of water, kids screaming with joy
I've hated crap like that since I was a boy
While everyone was laughing and having so much fun
I would mutter, this sucks, ’til the day was done
I detested most stuff and I still do
You see, I hate everything but you

I hate the feeling of the sun when it hits my skin
I don't like bands that have a guy on mandolin
I hate when people post pictures with the hashtag mood
I hate when people call blueberries a superfood
I hate when someone says: Oooh, it's magic hour!
Or when people actually stop and smell a flower
I hate white women who call their engagement rings bling
Oh yes, I hate everything
But you

More examples!
I hate guys who read magazines devoted to golf
Hate Frisbee golf, and when people call Frisbee golf frolf
I hate when people ask me if I’d ever get a tattoo
Hate combination conditioner and shampoo
I hate doing The Wave at a baseball game
I hate couples with a cutesy couple name
I hate when someone says a joke and someone else says, zing!
Oh yes, I hate everything
But you

'Cause when I look into your eyes and I see you smile
When you laugh at yourself and we talk for a while
Just for a moment, I forget
How much I hate it when people say: Gotta jet!

Even more examples!
I hate when people say they're going off the grid
Or when someone calls their baseball cap their lid
I hate models who just happen to date quarterbacks
I hate grown men who always quote Caddyshack

I hate the phrase Love conquers all, and I hate that it's true
'Cause I want to not hate things when I'm with you
You love so many things and you have so much fun
It makes me wish my hating days were done
And there's one thing I want you to know

I'll always hate guys who name their cars