Never Love An Anchor

On some level I think I always understood
That these hands of mine were clumsy, not clever
And I tried to be the best that I could
But try as I might, I couldn't bring myself to hold you

It's a secret I keep tucked inside my chest
With this heart of mine that's guilty
Not remorseful

There is love that doesn't have a place to rest
But it would have buried you if it had settled on your shoulders

On some level I think I always understood
That a ship could never really love an anchor
So I did the only thing that I could
And severed the rope to set you sailing from my harbor

There are times where I still wonder about you
You are someone I have loved but never known
And you'll never see the reasons I had
For keeping my claws away when they were close enough to hurt you

I am selfish, I am broken, I am cruel
I am all the things they might have said to you
Do you ever think of me and my two hands

And wondered why they never soothed your fevers
And wondered why they never tied your shoes
And wondered why they never held you gently
And wondered why they never had the chance to lose you?