That Dirty Old Man
Stephen Sondheim
Domina
For over thirty years,
I've cried myself to sleep,
Assailed by doubts and fears
So great the gods themselves would weep!
The moment I am gone,
I wonder where he'll go.
In all your simple honesty,
You can't begin to know,
Ohhhh...
I want him,
I need him.
Where is he?
That dirty old man is here somewhere,
Cavorting with someone young and fair,
Disporting in every shameless whim,
Just wait till I get my hands on him!
I'll hold him,
Enfold him.
Where is he?
That dirty old man,
Where can he be?
Profaning our vows for all to see,
Complaining how he's misunderstood,
Abusing me (if he only would!)
Oh, love,
Sweet love,
Why hide?
You vermin, you worm, you villain!
Come face,
Embrace
Your bride!
Wherever he is, I know he's still an angel,
My angel,
Where is he,
That dirty old man divine?
I love him,
I love him,
That lecherous, lewd, lascivious, loathsome, lying,
Lazy,
Dirty old man of mine!
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