How I Feel

I say a drink might help me sleep, I say
I don't sleep much at all these days, I say it's cold,
Besides, I'm broken.
Hard as earth the love of the past,
The worth of the world has frozen
Still.
Like the sheet of ice collecting on the windshield of my car.
Where I caught my reflection frozen in the glass,
A perfect broken image of the future I'd envisioned in the past-
Corrupted by fate now, fractured, and fading away.

Replace all I felt promised to me.
To be the one who figured it out,
Who knew what to do,
Who knew how to feel and
Felt that
Love of the past,
The worth of the world,
Just set it ablaze and
Thaw me out.

Dim lit in a room dark red, where I said,
"Can't seem to break off from the way I felt, but
I guess you understand, man. We had no chance.
I'm tired of fighting with the hand I've been dealt.

So, I take the cards they give me
And keep my protest on the inside of my mouth.
If the best I can do ain't gonna stop what's coming,
What's the point in trying to change how the hand plays out?

Don't we all just die?
When you looked at the light
Did it hurt your eyes?
When you looked at the light
Did it hurt you
Like it hurt me?