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Oh, you hear a lot of stories
'Bout the sailors and their sport
About how every sailor has a girl in every port
But if you added 2 and 2
You'd figure out right quick
It's just because the girls
All have a lad on every ship

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
It's often times a man
Will leave you broken with dismay

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
There's other things to twiddle
When the men have sailed away

Lucky Annie was a lady
Who'd been pleased by many men
They all would sail away
But then they'd come right back again
But if they never sailed her way
She really didn't care
Cause I know that you don't need a man
To twiddle under there

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
It's often times a man
Will leave you broken with dismay

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
There's other things to twiddle
When the men have sailed away

Saber had her lovers
They came in at every door
You could even say that she was really quite a whore
But when she needs some pleasing
She knows just where to go
I grab my good friend Madam Rouge
And we go down below

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
It's often times a man
Will leave you broken with dismay

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
There's other things to twiddle
When the men have sailed away

There was a time when Rouge
She found the sailor men a bore
Each new one was more tiresome
Than the one she had before
Now she finds more joy in breeches
Than she ever did of old
I'm more fond of their bulges
When they're pouches full of gold

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
It's often times a man
Will leave you broken with dismay

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
There's other things to twiddle
When the men have sailed away

Why the boys would look at her
It puzzled poor Flint Locke
She would sit and smile and nod
And let them brag and talk
But if they tried to touch her well
She'd put them on the run
Cause why would I need a lover
When I've got myself a gun

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
It's often times a man
Will leave you broken with dismay

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
There's other things to twiddle
When the men have sailed away

So next time you're with a lady
And she takes you to her bed
Be sure to please her well
And remember what we've said
For if you do not treat her right
Then know that this is true
Us ladies all can have our fun
Without involving you

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
It's often times a man
Will leave you broken with dismay

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
There's other things to twiddle
When the men have sailed away

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
It's often times a man
Will leave you broken with dismay

And it's Twiddle ee-aidee-ai-dee-ai
Twiddle ee-ai-de-ei
There's other things to twiddle
When the men have sailed away

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