Bad Mutha Fucka

Alright

I'm Layin' In bed with a lit cigarette
cant't say if last night was a blonde or brunette
Megan Fox is on the phone
keeps blowin' me up
and there's two shots of whiskey in the coffee cup
I'm a BadMuthaFucka

I can polish off a bottle in the blink of an eye
i can drink all night and not pay a dime
i'd just as soon kick your ass as take a piss
even fuckin' Chuck Norris don't want none of this
i'm a BadMuthaFucka

I can pick up any Chick that i meet at the bar
i can even take the one right off of your arm
i got a woman at home and a kid on the way
i got a girl in New York and 4 more in L.A.
I'm a BadMuthaFucka

(MuthaFucka)
I'm A BadMuthaFucka
(Whistles)

I got hookers by the handful five at a time
but they're the ones payin' me by the end of the night
their pimps hunt me down and try to get the cash
and then me and Samuel Jackson bust a cap in his ass
we're BadMuthaFuckas

BadMuthaFucka, C'mon

I write bad checks to the IRS
I'm a master at passin' sobriety tests
isell dope to the hot topic kids at the mall
I'm Like OJ baby, I get away with it all
it wasn't me

I'm a BadMuthaFucka
And He's in Jail MuthaFucka
C'mon

I got a room in my house for my ten foot bong
I'm pretty sure George Thorogood even wrote me a song
I'm a Bad, Bad, BAD, To the Bone
MuthaFucka

Bad to the bone

(there is only one MuthaFucka that may be badder then me and that would be Rob Quentin)

(Okay, just before i sing this, i want you to know i was raised Catholic,
But... I'm a virgin alter boy)

Okay

I get stoned on Sunday
and take my grandma to church
i puck up all the girls in their catholic skirts
i tell them that I've got a big van full of toys
Hell, it's better than the preacher jerkin' off little boys
he's worse than a badmuthafucka
I'm a BadMuthaFucka
He's a Bad Bad Man

(I wonder what you call that, Burnin' in Hell, Oh Shit! My Dad's parents are gonna be so proud of me)