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The Man Without a Tan

FFS

The man without a tan came strolling into town
He had the whitest collar and he brought a scene around
Girls were all a-drooling, [?] hum the lullaby
The men were all suspicious but they didn't know just why
The man without a tan, he's a threat to you and me
He has the kind of hands that you might see on your TV
And if he touched your woman, how the hell could she resist?
I'm sure he'll entertain her with a little bit of this

Our rugged handsomeness is no match for
The man without a tan
The man without a tan
The man without a tan
The man without a tan

The man without a tan, he had a walk around the town
He found a rollin' restaurant and entered and sat down
He ordered Coca-Cola with some lemon but no ice
He reached into his pocket and he found his lucky dice
He finished up his cola and the waitress thought, "So soon?"
He looked a little bit like Gary Cooper in High Noon
He left to find a movie theatre, it was shuttered down
It seemed like there were lots of things that had been shuttered down

Our rugged handsomeness is no match for
The man without a tan
The man without a tan
The man without a tan
The man without a tan

I overheard my girlfriend on her landline telephone
She thought I couldn't hear her but she really should've known
The man without a tan was on the line and being cute
I stood back in the showers, I was fuming in my boots

Our rugged handsomeness is no match for
The man without a tan
The man without a tan
Twenty years have passed and I'm the man without a tan
([?] to be a rugged handsome man)
The man without a tan
The man without a tan
And then you came right out with it and said, "You are my man"
(Then you came right out with it and said, "You are my man")
The man without a tan
The man without a tan
And then you came right out with it and said, "You are my man"
(Then you came right out with it and said, "You are my man")
The man without a tan
The man without a tan
And then you came right out with it and said, "You are my man"
(Then you came right out with it and said, "You are my man")
The man without a tan

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